Life's Journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, totally worn out, shouting "Wow...What a Ride!"

Wednesday, June 4, 2014


June 1

Faye's FB post:

Chipmunk 1+ (he got into my trail mix )
Dave 0

Just saw him scampering across the lawn from the neighbors rig, traps reset with peanut butter instead of cheese.

Dave's FB post:

I quietly got out of bed at 4:30am being careful not to wake up the queen from her slumber. Slowly I walk into the kitchen area to see what treasurers I may have caught in my traps, in my mind picturing the bulging eye balls and a broken neck of this creature that has been menacing the queen. The little bastard CHICK monk was able to get by my defenses and traps, entering the queens palace. It ate the cheese I had in the traps without setting them off and also ate the queens trail mix just to piss her off. Chipmunk 1 Dave 0, time to rethink my plan of attack. Made a couple strategic adjustments to my traps, reloaded with a secret bate mixture I been working on the last few years and reset the traps. Time to go to work and hopefully I be having CHICK monk for dinner, females ones are more tender.

Faye's FB post:

Chipmunk 2+

Dave .5

Came home to find one trap untouched, the other was moved across the floor and is nestled in between my shoes, don't know where the little devil is. Dave will have to work on his traps, the queen wants some peace in her palace.

Dave's FB post: 

The queen just got home from work and was reporting in on the CHICK monk status. She said one of my traps with the secret bate mixture that I've been developing over the last few years specially gear toured chipmunks was tripped and dragged around the RV. It got lodged in between a pair of the queens shoes and the critter got away. I asked her to take any hair, blood or semen samples she could find for examination when I get home, but she refused. It looks like I'm in this battle by myself, the queen wants nothing to do with the capture and or demise of the beast that I'm after. Chipmunk 3 Dave 0.5, I got some of it's hair and possible semen samples but Faye won't taste it to be sure. Time to rebate the traps with the secret special bate mixture that I have been formulating for the last couple of decades. I think the little bastard is laughing at me, this is WAR

June 2

Dave's FB post: 

The Chick monk is nowhere to be found. Got up this morning hoping this time to get more than just hair samples in my trap with my special secret bate mixture that I've been developing for the past 25 years or so, but nothing. Went to work today, overtime, gotta keep the queen is the life stile her has become accustom to and when I got home still nothing. After discussing the situation with myself, we come to the conclusion that the chipmunk realized the he was dealing with a superior intellect and was in a battle that he couldn't win. We believe the chipmunk was a male that was attracted to Faye because of the semen stain that was found on her sneaker. We also believe the chipmunk is ok, he was seen outside with a hairless bent tail and rejected look on his face. Time for him to find himself a chick monk so he can forget about Faye. I will keep the traps set for a couple more days just in case.

June 3 

Faye's FB post:

This morning Dave got up before I did, OT day for him, I got up just before he left. I asked him if he'd checked the traps, of course he hadn't so I peaked around the corner to one of the traps. All clear, time to move on into the living room and check the other one, oh my it's been moved, that looks like a body caught in it. Turned around and headed to the bedroom, time for my hero to handle this, soon I hear from Dave "are you sure it was a chipmunk you saw" and while I could swear I saw a stripe on the creature I saw this one didn't have one. Seems we've caught a mouse, still alive-nose had gotten caught, and Dave had been sitting in the living room while this thing probably flopped around a bit. Just goes to show you how aware men really are of things around them, at least some of the time. We still have the traps baited and set, just in case the word had been spread about access to Malouf's rv. Hope this is the end of this story. 

Dave's FB post:

Got up this morning before my queen awake to make sure the RV was clear of any dead bodies that may be in one of my traps bated with my special secret bate mixture I've been working on for the last 30 years or so. With my eagle like vision, I spotted a large rodent in the far trap way on the other side of the room and it was still alive. Knowing my queen would be waking soon, I ran across the room, diving on the massive critter, risking life and limb, killing it with one mighty blow. I dragged the creature to the garbage, with a thud it landed in the can. When the queen awake and enter the room, I greeted her, taking her hand, guiding her to her favorite chair. I told her that the beast the tormented her was dead and never to return again. I'll keep the traps set for a couple days just in case.

1 Mouse gone.....

On another note, my father continues to be hospitalized, blood clots were found in his legs and lungs. IV's were started to clear the clots in the legs, a tube was inserted into the lungs to dissolve the clots, he has pneumonia and has coughed up a small amount of blood. Dave and I are hanging tight here, Mom sounds good on the phone. She is staying in a hotel that has a direct shuttle to and from the hospital, if it's after hours the hotel security will drive her back and forth. The hotel is within walking distance but guests are strongly advised not to. Thank you everyone for the thoughts and prayers, your support is greatly appreciated.

Dave has been working some OT, trying to get as many dollars in the account while we're here. My hours are picking up, this is our weekend off so visits with long time friends are planned. Next weekend the campground is booked solid, we have a large group in, they've taken 19 sites, there is a BBQ on Saturday for Fathers Day and an ice cream social for the group on Friday evening. 

Until next time...


  1. Now what happened to my comment!!!! Hey have fun with your friends...just what you need this week. And Tell you mom not to walk that neighborhood! Glad things opening up for your dad...and middle of the week when the doctors are there, out and about and things are happening.

  2. Cute chipmunk saga :)

    Glad your dad is where he needs to be and that he'll be good as new before you know it.

    Have some of that toasted coconut ice cream for me! :)

  3. Trapping critters can take some perserverance, but you will win. I have found the big Victor electronic traps very very effective.

  4. Oh my -- quite the hunt for that pesky chipmunk!

    Sounds like the hospital is doing well in getting your dad back on the road to recovery. Fingers crossed that things continue to go well.

  5. Hope your devil-vermin issue is resolved......although it makes for fun reading :-). Sounds like the hospital is taking good care of both your parents - that has to be such a relief.

  6. Ah, the battle with the critters......we've encountered our fair share. Al has been crawling around under the rig with expanding foam that has some chemical rodent deterrent in it. My dad was in the hospital last week and had 2 stints put in and is feeling better than ever. Sending well wishes regarding your dad.


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